To the One I Love

Dearest X,

As the blogging world knows you as “X” or “K” or “The Man,” to me, you will, and always will be, mine.

I know that life has brought its challenges, to both with you and me. And I apologize for those long awkward silences in cars whilst you would drive when I  would attempt to keep the tears streaming from behind my glasses a secret from you, in fear that you would judge me….Or judge my ability to be that strong independent girl who always kept it together. And this kind of scares me, because it has never happened before.For the 26 years I have never had to hide myself from another being– lest alone, an amazing one at that.

 

For years I have spent protecting myself from love–from the possibility of a man loving me. Furthermore  after different times of heatbreak…ones which I feel happened right after the other, I gave up on the possibility of love.

But you, Kevin, are different from all those other men who’ve caused me heartbreak and anguish.

Kevin, (and yes I am referring to you by your real name…let the blogging world know), I love you.

This past year as we’ve grown to know each other as people, I grew to know a man who is honest, sincere, accepting, and loving. It doesn’t matter whether or not I still cannot ride over certain obstacles—you merely stop and tell me it is okay if I cannot ride over–that it is difficult–that one day I will to make it …

We’ve shared numerous bike rides of different kinds, experimented with new dishes, gone cross country skiing, fished in the back yard pond, taken a couple road trips, gone for evening walks after dinner, or simply gone for walks, picking out the houses in a different life we would want. We swam at Lake Onteora for the first time together with high hopes the rope swing would be there, only to find it was no longer there.

I apologize for those nights after work, or me working 12+ hours away, not coming home to meals specially prepared by you, because you already  knew I would be an emotional rollercoaster by the time i got home.

You kill or trap spiders on my walls for me, listen to me rant, and never complain. You tell me, whether or not my day at work was shitty– that I am still an amazing nurse….If one batch of cookies comes out bad, I always have another time to make them,

And despite the person inside me who wants to be perfect at anything I do, I do know that it takes time to navigate the perfect line on a bunch of crooked rocks in order to ” flow over them whenever I  ease,” while on a mountain bike, and a long life ahead of me to do athletic events that I want.

You know me better than anyone–you know exactly what I am thinking, and are definitely the voice of reason between us, i.e. when I was sick from Lyme you told me not to do a race I  really wanted to do, knowing that if I did attempt it, I would not get the result I wanted, leaving me with a heavy heart….Which is exactly what would have happened.

One day, I promise, I will be able to ride over those ridges with ease; without you having to wait for me.  I will finish the line; I will finish my baked good or what have you. I will finish it, with a smile on my face, and you to thanks.

 

And, the thing is, whether you gave me a hug or made dinner for me–the moment you held me in your arms I knew I was safe and loved, and everything would be okay.And after one full year…

Kevin, I love you.

Pure and simple. You are the man who has saved me from my fears, taught me to face my fears and have  loved me unconditionally. And for that, I love you, X, “the Man,” or for the first time ever spoken, Kevin.My best friend,and teacher.

Love, Me

 

 

Third Year’s a Charm

It’s hard to believe I’ve been in the Hudson Valley for three years already. Where did the time go? And what has happened?

I’ve gone through a variety of different sneakers…Some getting wet, others getting dirty.

I’ve endured scrapes, bruises, and tick bites.

Major ouch.

I survived my first road trip adventure, including sharp descents, rocks and roots.

I’ve made life long friends.

The Valley Girls

Best. Cousin. Ever.

I learnt how to make lemonade when life gave me lemons…Or juice out of berries.

I’ve taken lots of photos.

I watched things grow from seeds in my (first) garden.

I’ve gone for many rides.

Yes, all my bikes get used.

I’ve baked lots of cakes, both big and small, round and square.

I built my first bike, from scratch.

I expanded my family.

I met the love of my life…

Obsessed much?

Oh wait, I mean this love of my life.

I learnt it takes a strong person to compete in a race, and sometimes stronger one to know when to stop.

I was reminded how fun it is to dress up, and that every person is beautiful.

I learnt not to take myself too seriously.

I learnt how to ski, face my fear of open water swims, and mountain bike.

Most importantly I learnt that life goes on.

Thank you, to all of those whom I have met on this fabulous journey.

26, Already?

It seems like only yesterday I was turning a year older. But now  I can already feel my body aching when I wake up, people need to speak up, and my tricepts are flabby–getting up and down stairs is a chore–and this all happened overnight between turning 25 and 26 (that’s all a joke btw, except for body aching).

I must say I haven’t really had a birthday “celebration” in awhile–last year I had a raging fever and strep throat. Other years I have been working. So, since this has been the most memorable one, it deserves a post.

Last night out as a 25 year old with El Presidente

My friend and I decided to go on a 50 mile bike ride (well I decided to, since I need to train, and invited him to go along. I must admit it was a leisurly ride through the catskills with lots of picture taking stops. K is in much better shape then me, and kept me going when on my own I’d be left behind (I did let him go ahead and crush hills.)

New Haircut! Bangs bangs bangs

Before we left, we had a fuel filled breakfast, and I was greeted by homemade suprises!

Le chef

starting on Dug Hill

Thumbs up for 28A

Ashokan Resevoir

A fuzzy “26”

K. checkin it out.

Ewwww bug

Jumped over the fence–for a justifiable birthday pose.

zooming along

Yup, let’s see those guns.Show off.

The start of taking my hands off the handle bars

Almost!

Now when I win races, I’ll be able to look like a pro.

He takes more photos than I do!!!

Not expecting a photo to be taken….As if I could duck out of sight in that location….

Infront of a fountain. See, wasn’t lying when I said we had a lot of photos

going to go up soon

Maybe be I’ll do some hiking in my road riding shoes.

Made it- despite some slipping off slippery rocks…where were my mtn bike shoes when I needed them?

Then the fun happened….We found free stuff on the side of the road

Our rides

Ouuu! Free stuff!

Readjusting

We did have little free space to carry the goods between us, so I decided to empty my water bladder in my camel bak to make things fit. I was determined. Who needs water with 20 more miles to go?pshh.

Three good tuberware safely and finally fit

Our loot we lugged back! Go team M-K!

Our route is the below link. After the ride, a trip to my favorite restaurant, Santa Fe in Tivoli, and homemade apple pie–K remembered I hate cake 🙂

50 mile birthday ride

New, more bad-ass Luxembourg jersey!

26-er Apple Pie

And ofcourse, I make K get up at 4am to go see the sunrise at Ferncliff forest 🙂

Waiting

Sunrise!

Thank you, KJY, for the best birthday day.

Du Fast, Du Furious

Du Fast Du Furious

NYTRI

I cannot believe it’s already been a year since I raced in the 8th Annual Trooper Duathlon, which you can read about here, organized by the NYS Troopers, as well as the New York Triathlon Organization, which organizes similar sprint duathlins and triathlons in the Hudson Valley. It was the same course as last year – a 2-mile sprint run, followed by a 14-mile bike ride, and then a 2-mile sprint run.

However, this race was different than last years in that I was part of a relay team. I decided to do the relay with a friend of mine, SB, who did the running, while I did the biking. We were the Valley Girls. Might I add, the t-shirts we designed received a lot of praise around the course. All of the duathlons I have competed individually in. Being a part of a team added an extra element of possible complications, esp. with the handing off of the timing chip with each transition. My race day jitters were higher than normal, since in this race, I was a member of a team, so I had to work hard to not let the Valley Girls down. I think my jitters were shared by my partner. Normally, I’d warm up and run and then have the bike ride, so my legs would be warmed up. Only doing the bike portion was a little trickier since there was a delay from when the timer started, and when you biked. I should have brought my trainer with me….And a TT bike.

Showing how to warm up

Pre-race massage is what should be required at races. Don’t worry, they know each other.

BB transitioning, biking, and finishing the race strong.

BB did an awesome job considering he was basically on his feet most of the day before with the Fats in the Cats Annual Bike Swap. I am envious at both his run time and bike time. He was only 20 sec away from placing third in his category. Next year, BB, next year.

SB doing her part for the team, also finishing strong to bring in our first place!

Steph started the sprints and finished the sprints (both two miles each) strong–leading us to first place. She was consistent with her running, and, apparently, ran a quicker pace than she normally does–managing about an 8 min/min pace!

Zooming by

I cannot really remember the bike portion of the course form last year, or how I did, but this course is basically rolling hills that lead to the bottom of Dug Hill road–a hill that can make a grown man cry. It is a hill that messes with your soul and emotions. It is 4 miles– and the last 4 miles of the bike course. It goes up and up. Then, it has small sections of “flat” which are deceiving because just around the corner you’ll have a steep incline, and other steep incline. I did have a better time than last year, yet my thighs still burned (I definitely need to work on sprinting, and climbing–long road rides are good for Timberman training, but the sprinting is good for smaller distance triathlons or duathlons).

Race in Progress

Cheering on my partner at the finish line

Valley Girls post race–still strong. Let’s do another one!

The post-race refreshments were not your average bagels and bananas. The Troopers had a full BBQ with salads and ziti. I was stoked at the chocolate milk that they had. We all stayed for the award ceremony.

Valley Girls get First place!

I don’t know why I was slouching…Taken before we had to give the plaques back, because they were the plaques for the Co-Ed Relay Team. At least we got a picture. There will need to be a celebratory dinner when our real plaques come in.

SB and BB, what a great team in real life

My best supporter and me

All in all, it was a well organized race. Thank you, NYTRI.ORG, especially the NY State Troopers and those who have been lost doing their job. Another thank you to the Ulster County Sheriff’s Department and Ulster Police for keeping the roads safe for riders along the course, and to all the EMT’s, dedicating their time incase something happened to a participant. All of your services are greatly appreciated. Thank you, again. And a special thanks to K for taking all the photos 🙂

9th Annual Trooper Duathlon
co. of NYTri.org

A Letter to a Dear Friend

Dearest T.L. 

I just wanted to write a letter to you–and ran out of a paper, and figured writing on a scrap envelop would not be appropriate.

Today you celebrate your 13 years of being cancer free. 

13.

You are one of the strongest individuals that I have met– someone who does not judge, who has helped me deal with stresses of jobs, stresses of races (AND gave me flowers after my NYC 1/2 marathon!) , stresses of men/relationships/lack of relationships/stresses of honesty with friends…And you always have amazing advice, which I’ve taken to heart, even though sometimes it might seem like you are talking to a brick wall (brick wall being me).

You have the biggest heart of anyone I know. You never turn down a friend in need. 

And you’ve made it 13 years. And there will be so many more birthdays to come!

I love you as a friend. 

I love the advice you have given me.

I love your devotion to baking and cooking. And starting your own business. 

I love how you can whip up amazing appetizers for a simple game night.

I love how your inner- and outer- beauty shines. 

“Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”~ Christopher Robin to Pooh

T.L, I may not have been there with you, in the present, but I’ll always be there for you. 

When was the last crazy post written?

November 2019
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